Two of my favorite things in the world are tea and whiskey. Especially since I just finished a horrendous four hour Criminal Law final, I might need a little bit of both to get me through the rest of the day.
Here’s a perfect recipe for those useless hours between “coffee” and “wine.”
- 1 cup boiling water
- 1 tea bag (best with a black tea)
- 2 shots of whiskey (or more, if you feel like it. No judgment here!)
- 1 tablespoon milk
- 1 teaspoon white sugar
- Boil some water. Pour it in a fancy pants mug.
- Throw in the tea bag to steep for as long as the tea needs. Usually around 3-5 minutes. Remove and discard.
- Put one shot of whiskey in the tea. Take the other one because you deserve it.
- Add milk and sugar to your pleasing.
- Stir, drink, forget your problems.
Dear Barbri Prep,
As finals approach, I wanted to write a quick note (as I procrastinate for finals) about the services you provide and how they have helped me throughout my first year in law school. While I am still prone to heart palpitations when the professor looks for a student to call upon, I am the basest level of prepared for any ridiculous question they might have due to those wonderful videos you have on your site. It brings me immense joy when I am able to adequately answer a question that some other
idiot student in the class was asked, but was unable to answer. The extra five minutes I save from reading your outlines and watching your videos allows me to have the mental breakdown I deserve. That being said, I understand that your company forsaking me in my time of need is a definite foreseeable risk. Please be aware of your duty of care to me, as breaching this duty of care in the next two weeks constitutes adequate provocation. All I want is an estoppel from failure, and a good night’s sleep.
Have the best day legally allowed,
PS- betraying the relationship of trust that we have makes you a fidouche. Remember that.